I put on cozy clothes, had a sip of wine, and took a deep breath. Melissa manned ("womanned"?) the clippers. Everyone had their cameras out and clicking. I was incredibly nervous and worried that I'd have warts all over my scalp, or some big dents from being dropped on my head as a child, or some other horrible deformity that would make me look like Quasimoto instead of the goddess I was hoping for. However, after the first few swipes, I could see that my skull was at least round and relatively blemish-free, and so I relaxed a bit. We did a mohawk first (how can you not?), applied some lipstick for that authentic punk-rocker look, snapped some shots, and then carried on.
I watched in the mirror as the hair disappeared, and I appeared. After I was relatively bald, the lipstick came out again and everyone gave me big smackeroos on my new pate (which took much scrubbing to remove but was well worth it). A long shower and much hair clean-up, and the deed was done.
I'm happy I'm not deformed, I'm happy my head is round, but mostly I'm just happy I still look like me.